Living per duality and its constant interaction of opposing elements creates a sense of completeness. Eventually, so much that you forget to believe in more than one, thus not hiding non-duality.
From Duality Hack #8.9 in Alexius’ Duality Hacks.
No feeling is singular
The duality flow is not about the opposing elements in the duality pairs but their constant interaction. However, to join it, you start by acknowledging one of the elements in a duality pair as your distinct response to an experience, for example, hatred. Then, you perceive hate as ‘it is what it is.’ Therefore, since love comes out of hatred, that comes out of love, you are in the interaction of opposites: the duality flow.
But at any moment, hatred may reveal that kindness can also define it. Therefore, this twofoldness replaces the former until kindness is defined by selfishness. After that, humility may partner with selfishness to explain it.
And so it goes until you shut off the duality flow by focusing on a specific element in a duality pair to appear singular, not dual. You continue this singularity until you are fed up with the hectic stream of thoughts required to appear distinctive in a world of duality. Then you perceive your stress as ‘it is what it is’ to return to the duality flow.
All feelings are twofold
The first time Alexius experienced what he later named the duality flow was during a gentle but physical massage. He did not try to escape the unpleasant feeling triggered by the massage but kept being it emotionally. Then, relatively quickly, the unpleasantness quietly opened up and revealed joy inside. Later, Alexius recognised that the same happens if you perceive a specific feeling or opinion as ‘it is what it is.’ It reveals it is not singular but two opposing parts, constantly interacting.
Much later, Alexius experienced something similar when his cat, Uma, died. First, it made him feel like his body was doomed. But how could a dead cat create a feeling of death in his body? He concluded that unconsciously, he must have projected this feeling of extinction onto his body. So, he consciously brought it back into the psychological sphere where feelings originate. Then, he recognised death is coupled with birth.
So, although he had lost his cat physically, his experience of loss was paired with birth in the psychological zone. Therefore, since Uma kept coming and going mentally, Alexius got into the interaction of birth and death in the psychological area, thus feeling happy/sad with his cat.
If you suffer because somebody has died, you stand by the discomfort so you can perceive it as ‘it is what it is.’ Then, you experience suffering is not singular but twofold, so it does not make you feel alone but together.
In other words, since the death of his beloved cat made it impossible for Alexius to project love onto her physically, his relationship with Uma returned to the psychological sphere, where it had always been and will be until his experience of duality ends.
That is not to say you should denounce your body. When you do not project non-physical issues onto the body, it is free from your idea of integrating it with mental ideas of wellness. Ergo, you can feel the material well-being it gives you, and in the psychological sphere, you can feel mentally well.
A feeling always contains the opposite
Having a singular feeling revealed as twofold is not an intellectual process (see also Duality Hack #6.5). It is more of an emotional revelation. First, you perceive a specific feeling as ‘it is what it is.’ Second, in a state of expectation, calling for nothing specific, you patiently wait a few seconds to a minute. Third, your singular feeling opens up, and its opposite takes its space for a brief moment – like breathing out for a short time, replacing breathing in.
The transition is so gentle that it surprises you. You forget the specific feeling you perceived as ‘it is what it is.’ But you are very aware of the opposite feeling. It is defined by the first one that soon replaces the new one, which redefines the first one. As they both are experienced via their opposite, they are not distinctive but dual.
This interplay is as automatic as breathing in and out, where one automatically leads to the other. That is why you may forget the elements in a duality pair. However, you do not forget how well-grounded and beloved you feel in their interplay: the duality flow,
Vitalised by the duality flow
At first, you may get to the duality flow from the perception, ‘it is what it is,’ as described above. But soon, you can recall it by memory. After all, being in the constant interaction of opposites is your natural state in a world of duality. So, suppose you want to take care of yourself. In that case, you do not fight your nature by dividing the duality pairs into distinct components seen at odds but enjoy their collaboration, so you feel the abundance of twofoldness and not the scarcity of singularity.
Having said that, initially, Alexius was amazed by the revealed component of a duality pair. So, he dived into feeling that especially instead of going with the interaction of the opposing elements. But soon, he could not help but join the duality flow. He often feels it is like being emptied by waves gracefully going nowhere. At other times, he feels it like a pendulum in the psychological sphere. Since experiences are personal, yours may differ from Alexius’. Nevertheless, you know you are in the duality flow when you keep smiling for no reason.
Going with duality
You know the opposing elements in the duality flow contain each other, but you do not experience them simultaneously – like breathing in and out. Also, like breathing, you do not hold onto one of its expressions. You need their interplay. Imagine sitting on a see-saw on a playground. One person goes up while the other goes down. If you try holding onto the top by avoiding going down, you do not get a genuine ‘top’ feeling. You need to go back and forth to define what is up and down – like there is nothing to describe breathing in if you do not breathe out. Besides, the thrill of duality does not come from being at the top but from the interaction of that and being down.
In the psychological sphere, you hold yourself spellbound by the idea that twofoldness can be separated into independent items, thus enabling you to separate hate from love.
Twofoldness is always the way to experience something. For example, taking a step forward includes the past because it is the building stone for your future step. Likewise, if you exclude hate from love to get an intellectual notion of pure love, you do not hit the road of duality. Hence, you do not get the togetherness of twofoldness but the loneliness of singleness.
First, you imagine dumping your unwanted feelings in the body. Second, you perceive the body as tight, so physical unpleasantness seems to hide the psychological feelings. Third, you interpret the tightened body as proof of having concealed your unwanted feelings in its darkness. Fourth, you fail to remember what you have done.
As mentioned in Duality Hack #7.1-5, many people separate hate from love by projecting their hatred onto a vulnerable body part. Next, they lure themselves into believing their hatred is eliminated. Finally, they render themselves unconscious of what they have done to see themselves as only lovely. However, emotions are abstract, and bodies are substantial, so assuming you can dump hate in flesh and bones is absurd.
That is why, since you cannot remove your hatred from the awareness by hiding it in a vulnerable part of the body, the disturbance experienced there is in the psychological sphere. And since it is abstract, you do not solve the problem materially but mentally. When you gently look at the perceived disturbance in the psychological zone, you quickly see it is not definitive but twofold. Hate is paired with love to make you feel whole in the duality flow.
Every story has an end
When you consider food eaten at noon as lunch, you do not have food but a lunch story in which you and others have been assigned a specific role. That is one example of how our days consist of stories telling us how to behave. Another is that we adapt to the story of time as divided into days, as if it is real, not an agreed-upon construction.
Fortunately, you do not have to stop or change your stories to find reality. Instead, you perceive your reaction to any internal or external story as ‘it is what it is.’ Since it reveals your response is twofold, you join the duality flow. It does not stop the story, but it makes you indifferent. Therefore, unshackled by the constraints of your time-bound imagination, a world defined by time and space becomes a source of amusement.
You may have adjusted to the story that finding reality is a quest for singularity. But since reality is formless, it is neither singular nor anything else, as that implies a form. For the same reason, you cannot discover or comprehend reality in a world defined by time and space.
However, when believing you are living in a capsule of time and space, perceiving nothing but forms, you can recognize that every form has a beginning and, consequently, an end. Hence, it is only a matter of time before the belief in time and space does not seem to cover reality is the formlessness of oneness.
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