4.4 Sadness is a close friend of gladness [draft]

Updated November 16, 2021

When feeling sad is perceived as ‘it is what it is,’ it is revealed to be paired with gladness. This revelation sets off the experience of other duality pairs, for example weakness and wellness, disappointment and contentment or tears and laughter. Going with the duality flow, you, eventually, feel so entertained that you cannot ask for more. Thus there is no need for duality. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Suppose you do not acknowledge the negativity in yourself but project it onto others. In that case, you disconnect yourself from the positivity inside you because it is your negativity that defines it. The same applies if you hide negative thoughts and feelings from your awareness by projecting them onto vulnerable parts of your body. Long story short, when you do not ratify your negativity, the experience of being positive is fake. Read here about how you quickly bring back what you have projected onto others.

To formulate genuine positivity in you, the negativity that you encompasses but have cut off from your awareness must be restored as yours. This is done by acknowledging that you feel your negativity when you perceive something in the world as negative because what you get is what you have. Just like the suns colouration of your skin is determined by the pigmentation in you.

In plain English, you undo the separation from your negativity by acknowledging that you see your own negativity when you perceive something outside of yourself as unfavourable. This does not mean you have a beggar inside you when you see someone begging on the street. But if you judge that to be negative, you have this negativity inside you.

Just like a quick look from above is sufficient to ratify there is the water in a well, a glance of the negativity inside you is enough to feel that you have it, wherefore your reaction to it can be perceived as ‘it is what it is.’ This literally opens up your response and reveals its counterpart. Read more about that here. Since the experience of this, and any other, polarity makes you feel complete, the belief in duality can be undone completely.

In hack #4.2 The brain’s script and how to perceive it to feel happy, you can read about how the perception ´it is what it is´reveals that your fixed opinion of something is twofold. Hence you do not get the frustration of separation but the satisfaction of togetherness.

Any experience perceived as positive is bound to be complemented by another deemed as negative because everything comes in pairs of opposing experiences in a world of duality. A foreground, for example, is paired with a background, so they can define each other. Read more about the contrasts of duality here. For example, negative thinking confirms positivity, hate verifies love, sadness substantiates gladness, and so on. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

This was the short version. The longer one is that when you begin to bring back negativity into your awareness as your own, the interplay of negativity and positivity may not get your attention right away. Instead, chances are you feel like on the way to hell because you are overwhelmed by forgotten and unpleasant emotions that keep coming out of the dark. Read more about that here. Perhaps this starts off slowly with a familiar sense of depression that you a long time ago hid from your awareness by imagining to dump it behind the feeling in a vulnerable part of the body.

But since depression is often a rage pushed down, it is only a matter of time before it flares out in brutal hellfire. Maybe that feels as if acid-like splashes come out of the fragile segment of the body you initially imagined hiding your anger behind. Or perhaps it feels like you are tortured by a ruthless and evil force.

Something inside of you, interpreted as evil, turns out to contain goodness as well when this interpretation is perceived as ´it is what it is.´ Likewise, there is success in failure and an angel in a monster. However, none of these opposing elements are important in themselves. It is the interaction of them that feels like paradise, whereas standing explicitly by on one of them feels like shit.

Not escaping but acknowledging the feeling of hell, this single-minded response can be perceived as ‘it is what it is. Since that turns it into a dualistic reaction, hell is not alone anymore but complemented with heaven. Amazed by this polarity, you realise there is no heaven without hell in a world of duality – just like there is no breathing in without breathing out. You cannot have one without the other. They are like two sides of the same coin.

In other words, the acknowledgement of hell does not make it go away but unmasks heaven, which lay bare hell, and so on. This interaction does not happen in a balanced or harmonious way, but in an adventurous manner in which you experience to rapidly go up and down between the pleasure of heaven and the displeasure of hell – like when you have fun going up and down in a roller coaster or relax playing yoyo. You can also compare it to the ocean waves: sometimes they are big and fast, at other times they are small and slow or hardly there.

Since twofoldness is what duality is all about, and you believe to be in a world of duality, going with the interaction of hell and heaven makes you feel complete. And since this automatically leads to the experience of other pairs of duality, the feeling of completeness, eventually, becomes so intense that you forget to define yourself by duality. Consequently, there does not appear to be someone hiding non-duality. The process leading up to that may seem more comfortable if the problematic areas in the body, where you once attempted to conceal singular feelings, are fixed.

If you acknowledge every feeling that pops up, there are no feelings to hide. Consequently, you are set free from your own suppression.

In a world of duality, everything comes in pairs. So if you do not try to split any of them to hold onto a singular perspective of love, for example, you are aligned with duality. This does not mean things work better for you, but that it does not bother you. You feel complete because you are in the duality flow. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

When you do not hide your unpleasant emotions from the consciousness by imagining to dump your discomfort behind the feelings of pain in the body, it does not feel attacked by your psychological problems. Thus it relaxes and becomes available for healing. But not by the idea of integrating body and mind. This body sees an attack on its physical integrity.

If dualism is not rejected, any unpleasantness you have suppressed will start interacting with its counterpart. Thus the tensions you uphold in the body to keep these emotions hidden slowly but surely dissolve.

Fortunately, the brain has the blueprint of the body’s composition. Hence it can restore the body by its anatomy with the help of nature and perhaps health care professionals. Since that makes you feel entirely physical, the belief in being that can be wholly undone.*

The brain automatically maintains the body if you do not try to perfect it through yoga, fitness and whatnot.

In a world of duality, there is nothing better than the duality flow. But since most want to be in control and establish that via single-minded postulates, it may, at first, feel anxiety-provoking to be in the duality flow. To stop the constant interaction of opposing experiences, you may decide to be unquestionably right about something. Although this gives you a sense of superiority, the overall feeling is despair because you never seem to get it quite right. That is until you stop upholding singular opinions as facts but go with the duality flow. In that, any point of view is exposed as twofold. Thus you feel nonsectarian, which is necessary to feel completed by the constant interaction of opposites in a world of duality. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Please be aware that you are not in charge. The brain is. If a health care professional is needed, it wants you to make the connection, but it does not need your help connecting with nature. The brain has already hooked you up with the cosmos. That is why you do not fall off the planet, for example. When the physical linkage with the universe is not disrupted by mental ideas like mindfulness, you feel entirely connected.

This does not mean you must abandon such ideas to feel connected with nature but that you perceive your interpretation of them as ‘it is what it is.’ That reveals it is dual. Therefore, since you are in a world of duality, you are aligned with its nature. Being that, you do not wonder what is coming because that is in the duality flow. Read more about that here.  Hence your next step comes automatically – just like breathing in follows breathing out.

All in all, there is nothing you need to stop thinking or doing if you want to undo the belief in duality. It ends by itself if your interpretations of your experiences are perceived as ‘it is what it is.’ This exposes your judgment as dual. Thus you are aligned with the world of duality, and since everything has a beginning and end in such a world, this perception is the beginning of the end.

Here you can read more about the obstruction of the natural relationship between the brain and the body and how the connection can be restored.

A state of not-knowing does not provide you with the fulfilment of duality but the bliss of nothing. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Should the descent into hell** seem so distressing that you overlook its counterpart, relaxation, a break from duality may be the way to go. This is not done by pacifying yourself via meditation, praying or sedating music, for example, but by not withholding your anxiety, so the full speed of it can ignite a take-off into the empty breath (read more about that in hack #5.2 Uncontrolled speed leads to a state of not-knowing).

The empty breath immediately brings you to a state of not-knowing if you want to be released from duality. In this state, experiences go on, as usual. But since there is nobody to respond to them, there is no reaction to establish they make a difference. Hence the idea that there is more than oneness falls apart. And so does the brain after 20 minutes, 45 at most, because it has nothing to process without the affirmation of differences. Consequently, you should not remain in a state of not-knowing too long at a time if you do not want to permanently undo the belief in duality (read more about that here).

Fortunately, not much time is needed in a state of not-knowing to have the slate wiped clean (read more about that here), so you return to a world of duality with the perception ‘it is what it is.’ Read more about that here. When that is the default perception of your response to an experience, it is not sensed as singular but twofold. Hence, as you probably already have figured out, the descending to hell is complemented with arising to heaven. Thus you feel complete.

This is not to say that non-duality is a fusion of heaven and hell or the union of all contrasts. On the contrary, non-duality is not something, nor nothing, because it takes more than one to be anything. Hence non-duality is formless and therefore endless, wherefore it is everything.

However, the topic of hack #4.4 The duality flow goes to non-duality is not non-duality but duality. You need to be fully anchored in the idea that you are someone in a world of duality if you want to undo that belief – just like you need to play a game to finish it. Thus we continue in the context of duality in ‘What if…?’ versus ‘it is what it is’.

*) This transition happens over time and mostly at sleep because you cannot interrupt the brain with foolish ideas of unity and wellness when not awake. So if you feel like sleeping a lot, by all means, do it.

**) You may find the book Descent to the Goddess interesting regarding the descent to hell, even though it is not in line with Alexius’ Duality Hacks and supposedly only for women.

NOTE: This article is part of hack #4.4 The duality flow goes to non-duality.