You are good enough as you are

Updated December 19, 2022

The special self is to be compared to a con man. The more it can deceive others into believing it has something they do not have, the better it feels about the image it has made up about itself. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

In most cases, you do not have to read Alexius’ Duality Hacks in a particular order. But in the case of this article, you may benefit from reading hack #4.1 The basic self versus the special one.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The basic self never tries to look professional, so if it appears perfect, it is how the brain’s script is compounded. But the special self always tries to look perfect because it does not believe it is carried by the brain’s script but the rules of society, which are made to suppress instincts, favouring a spotless appearance.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self always fears missing events it perceives crucial because it wants to be part of something special. On the other hand, the basic self sees itself as hooked up to the brain, and since it is the maker of all experiences, the basic self is part of everything that can be experienced. Thus it has nothing to miss.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The approach of the basic self can be compared to buying an album from an artist and listening to it all, whereas the special self prefers to stream the album so it can exclude the tracks that do not enhance its special image.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

A participant in a game like Monopoly has the same goal as the special self: to take everything from everybody. But that is not the goal of the basic self. It has no intention of being or having something that sets it apart from the whole.

It does not know the concept of individuality. Nor does it know that the special self thinks it is possible to do things in its way because, just like in Monopoly, everybody, regardless of the colour of their car, has to move by the dice.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Like a self-driving car, the basic self follows the instruction it receives without favouring anybody in particular. Hence it automatically does what is in the best interest of everybody.

On the other hand, the special self always uses the signals from the brain to see how much it can get for as little as possible at anybody’s expense. Should somebody be hurt by this, it blames them and states that as a fact by saying, »Look what you made me do.«

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

As the special self always waits for something better, it is stuck in a prison of expectations. On the other hand, since the basic self hopes for nothing, it feels free. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Like a self-driving car follows the commands from the internet, the self, whether basic or special, serves the brain. But unlike a self-driving car, the self has a consciousness that can choose how to perceive itself. When this perception is in sync with the brain’s script, the self automatically has an impersonal approach to everything, thus being basic. But when the perception is centred around being more important than others, thus being special, it is not in sync with the script because it favours nobody in particular.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

For the special self, everything is about itself, so when a relative has been injured in a traffic accident, the typical response is, »How could you do it to me.«

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Since the experience of what and where we appear is fabricated by the brain (read more about that here), we feel connected when we follow the rules of the brain and unconnected when we try to change them.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

When you perceive to fail, your perception is out of sync with the brain’s script because, according to that, you are good enough as you are. The perception is also out of sync, if you believe it was due to solid willpower, you lost weight. The only reason it happened was the brain’s script. But your interpretation of your new look is not out of sync with the brain’s script if perceived as ‘it is what it is’ because that reveals it is twofold, wherefore you are in sync with the brain’s script of duality.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Because the special self has fabricated a story where it is independent of the brain, it feels lost when not experiencing being connected with others. But no matter how many likes on Facebook it gets, it is never enough because its independence is based on the idea that there is more.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self continuously looks for more love, realisations, or whatever makes it appear to be and has more than others. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

According to the special self, there must be something bigger that will relieve it from its troubles because if not, everything seems hopeless. Yet hopelessness sets it free from the future, thus from the past, and consequently from worries.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

It is always about returning to the way it was before for the special self. But not so for the basic self. It does not know how it was. Actually, neither does the special self. It is the story it has composed about the past that it wants to manifest in the present, so it seems everything always has been like it assumes it should be.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

»Edit your life frequently and ruthlessly. It is your masterpiece, after all.« This quote from the web shows a widespread misunderstanding, namely that life is yours. In reality, it is the other way around. Therefore, the more you try to edit life to appear unique, the more suffering your uniqueness seems to cause you.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self wants to compare everything new with something old so that the present seems conditioned by the past, which it has edited to look like it was caused by itself.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self splits up its perception of others per its concepts of right and wrong and then expects them to hide or correct what it has labelled as wrong so it does not have to question itself.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

When you perceive your response to the moment as ‘it is what it is,’ there is no future to look forward to, thus no stress. That is why the basic self feels relaxed, and the special self seems tense because it never perceives the present moment like that. Actually, it does not perceive it all. Instead, it is busy making an exciting perception of the next moment founded on ‘I know what it is,’ so the future seems to be going its way, and the special self can look forward to something exceptional.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Since the basic self is not in control of anything, it has nothing to let go of. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Extraordinary experiences, such as glimpses of the Enlightenment of that which is One, seem to be at a premium for the special self. Yet, it seldom experiences anything but the ordinary because, to prevent its special image from cracking, it fences off unfamiliar experiences.

If something uncontrollable, like glimpses of Enlightenment, should enter its controlled world, the special self ignores it, wait for it to be over, suppress its memories, and resume life as it used to.

You can read about how to have glimpses of Enlightenment in The four aspects of Enlightenment and how to sample them.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Many articles in the news point out that hardly any part of the earth is untouched by the damaging impacts of humanity. But there are very few pointing out that hardly any part of a human is untouched by the detrimental ways physicists, psychologists and new agers label every nook and cranny so that most feel compelled to adjust their perception of themselves to these rigid definitions instead of the natural flow of thoughts coming from the brain.

 ∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Whether you have convinced yourself to indulge in or refrain from sex, the purpose is to enhance being unique.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self hates being told what to do. So if it seems avoidable, it makes up a story in which it is detached from what happens, wherefore it is not taking orders but going with the flow.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Perhaps you were so tired that you erased your hard disk by mistake. Though you cannot undo it, you can correct how you perceive your reaction to data loss. For example, if you feel sad, you perceive it as ‘it is what it is,’ which reveals sadness is complemented by happiness. And since they constantly interact, sadness does not get sticky. Thus starting afresh feels adventurous.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Everything comes in pairs in a world of duality. Therefore, since happiness and sadness are two sides of the same coin, the basic self knows that when it feels sad, happiness is included.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self does not survive torture, but the basic self does. It has not added something to itself, so there is nothing to take away. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Since nothing ever turns out as the special self expects, it is never satisfied. On the other hand, the basic self expects nothing. Instead, it curiously looks forward to seeing what it gets. And whether that makes it satisfied or dissatisfied, the basic self feels entertained because it perceives its feelings as twofold. Hence satisfaction includes dissatisfaction and vice versa.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Neither the basic nor the special self is in charge of anything. The latter, however, believes it can change that by making a perception of the past as if the special self, not the brain, was in charge. But no matter how you perceive the past, you have never been in charge. The brain runs the show, and, as parents look after their kids, it always protects you.

But unlike parents, the brain does not protect you from evil because you cannot feel good without evil. Goodness is defined by evil and vice versa – just like going down on a rollercoaster defines going up and vice versa. You need them both to be entertained. That is why everything in the brain’s script is twofold.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self always looks for mistakes in itself to correct, thus appearing in control. But the basic self does not consider itself in charge of anything. On the contrary, it is a servant of everything because it is adjusted to the flow of thoughts from the brain, which does not care about personal preferences but what is best for the whole.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

If one has a personality of a faultfinder, the special self sees it as a mistake that needs to be corrected. Thus, every new mistake it finds disappoints, whereas the basic self is happy because finding errors fulfils its function.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The legs that seem to make you run in a dream are not yours because they rest in your bed. Likewise, what you appear to be in a world where there seems to be more than one is not that which is you. It rests with that which is One, and since it takes more than one to be somewhere, it is nowhere. Yet, it is also everywhere because oneness is formless, thus endless.

 

The special self wants to outdo everyone perceived to be better than itself, so it can take what it perceives to be its rightful seat as the master of the universe. On the other hand, the basic self perceives itself as ‘it is what it is,’ thus feeling good enough. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Your extraordinary ideas block you from feeling good because that does not require anything but being in sync with the thoughts coming from the brain. After all, making you feel good is their purpose.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The special self is bound to get angry because it perceives itself as in charge, although it hardly ever gets what it sets out to obtain. And if it does, it feels restless because it always wants more. On the other hand, the basic self never looks for more. Why should it? It is in sync with the brain’s script, thus feeling happy no matter how much it has.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The world of the basic self is not without sadness, but as that and happiness are like two sides of the same coin, you cannot be sad without being happy.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

The basic self perceives everything that happens in the best interest of the whole because the brain’s script excludes nobody. But the special self perceives everything happening as a means to get more for itself at the expense of others. Thus it does not get the satisfaction of feeling connected with the whole but the dissatisfaction of being alone.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Satisfaction comes from having a perception in sync with the brain’s script of duality. However, the special self does not like duality because it wants to be singular. Since that makes it feel alone, it spends much time adjusting its perception of itself, but on its terms. Hence it remains feeling separated and abandoned.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

You are not necessarily out of sync with the brain’s script having grievances. However, if you justify them with selected script fragments, you do not perceive your grievance as ‘it is what it is’ but as something that emphasises you as special. Hence you do not get the satisfaction of being in sync with the script. The same applies to the justification of any other feeling.

In other words, if you feel love and justify it with your spouse, love seems to have a specific shape, thus eventually feeling imprisoned by it instead of feeling free in the ever-changing flow of the brain’s script.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Happiness is a mechanical product of the brain, which needs to be counteracted with sadness to know whether you are happy. That is the way of duality, and ultimately speaking, there is no solution to this constant interaction of opposites other than having the belief in duality undone. However, that does not result in something because non-duality is oneness, and it takes more than one to get a result. Fortunately, the absence of something is pure peace.


NOTE: The above article is part of hack #4.2 The brain’s script and how to perceive it to feel happy.