4.2 Control is the fear of not being good enough

Updated April 24, 2022

The brain makes all the experiences believed to be yours or others and stores the ones you believe to constitute what you and others are. Hence the appearance of you and others as substantial beings in a tangible world is the brain and vice versa. This also applies to experiences considered spiritual. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Even though the brain deceives you by making experiences that seem to establish you as someone substantial in a tangible world, it is not your enemy. On the contrary, the brain wants to make you happy. If that is not how you feel, you have most likely disassociated yourself from the brain’s experiences. Instead of perceiving them as they are, you perceive them as they should be per a specific religion or philosophy that you fancy.

But since everything in this perception revolves around you knowing better than the brain, and since you do not know who you are, it is hard work to make it look like you, not the brain, knows the best. So when it gets too stressful, you meditate or force your body into strange positions to cut off the brain, assuming this will make you feel free from its perceived tyranny and replace frustration with fulfilment.

Metaphorically speaking you should eat all thoughts with much pleasure, because they are just as sweet as you.

However, the rejection of some or all thoughts as the root of evil does not result in completion but as if something is lost. On the other hand, should you perceive all thoughts as presents from the brain, they will not seem to cause loss, nor abundance, but completion because the thoughts coming from the brain constitute what and where you appear to be.

To sum up, the brain renders a self in which it installs a consciousness so the self can perceive itself as someone in a tangible world outside itself via the experiences fabricated by the brain. Consequently, the brain is the same as what and where you experience in being, regardless of whether it is perceived as material or spiritual.

You try to restrict the only friend you have, namely the brain, by dividing the thoughts it generates into pairs of duality. For example, good and evil, are split into separate elements so you can suppress the evil via meditating or projecting it onto others to appear as you are only good, thus beyond the brain’s script of duality. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Ultimately speaking, you are not the brain or anything else because there is no more than that which is one, and it takes more than one to be anything. Consequently, just like what you appear to be, this article is nothing disguised as something.

That is why trying to change something is like changing the colour of your hair. Though the new tone makes you look different, the original colour remains the same underneath it. But, nevertheless, more or less everybody believes that changing their look results in more money, power, love, peace, silence or whatever they assume makes them more special and appreciated.

Control is the fear of not being good enough to be affirmed as someone in the world of something.

This wish to change ourselves often starts in early childhood, where we learned that when we changed our appearance into something our parents considered more lovable, we would get more attention and hence a feeling of being loved. Read more about that here. Consequently, most have concluded that they can manipulate others into liking them by controlling themselves.

Several events can have led to this conclusion. Maybe your parents forced you to use the toilet before you were ready. In an attempt to please them and be the child they wanted, you decided to control your urination by tightening the muscles in the loin. However, the price of getting their ‘love’ was a damaged body. The premature constriction of the muscles blocked the natural flow in the biological system, so the communication between the body and the brain was disrupted.

Therefore, as the body was left on its own, it tried to fix the problems itself. The blockage in the loin, the body, attempted to solve by balancing it with a new issue created in the shoulder, neck or jaw. Maybe all three of them or at least the jaw because when it is stiffened in a forward position it is possible to keep the specific expression in place that you expect is wanted from you.

However, the body could have chosen to counteract the blockage in the loin with one in the feet, so many years after you have cold feet. Or it could have counteracted it with stiffness, thus pain, in the hands, that would show up much later as something you assume has been caused by using a computer a lot.

The brain has planned the life of a self, and you cannot alter it. But you are free to perceive the self, so it seems to be in charge of itself. This is done by making up stories that, in retrospect, establish everything goes according to your plan. And if not, you can always blame the brain. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

But this further disrupted the communication between the brain and the body. And though you can diminish the new problems in the body via massage, acupuncture and whatnot, the relaxation will not last because the hardened loin will soon reinforce the stiffness in the new issues to balance out the rigidity in the lower body.

Hence you will never feel the healing, that the natural flow of a biological system adequately hooked up with the brain brings about. Instead, you feel held back by something you cannot find because you try to find it in the body and not in what has caused the blockage, namely the perception of yourself as inferior. In other words, if you do not manipulate others into loving you by controlling your body, the natural flow of the biological system is not disrupted by your meddling. Thus the brain can maintain a sound body.

A straightforward way to correct how you feel about yourself is to perceive your reaction to it as ‘it is what it is.’ This reveals that your response is twofold. So if your single-minded interpretation of it was that you are wrong, it is supplemented with being right. Therefore, as you are in the duality flow, you are set from being defined as something specific. And so are those you deemed to imprison you. Eventually, the duality flow will undo the belief in being someone at all. Thus there is nobody to misinterpret anything. However, this hack is about having a good time as someone while having the belief in being that undone. So we go on with the brain’s script.

Read more about the duality flow in hack #4.4 The duality flow goes to non-duality.

Since the brain’s script is as fixed as the earth’s motion around the sun, the same physical tensions in the loin would have occurred, whether or not you tried to adjust to your parents to get their love. However, the tension would not have turned into a psychosomatic problem if you had perceived yourself as good enough because it would sync you with the brain since it loves you as you are. Consequently, the tension in the loin would have been straightforward to deal with as a physical problem. Fortunately, it is never too late to correct your perception of the past.

There is nothing to be found in Alexius’ Duality Hacks. That is why reading them will hack the belief in being something. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

The above explanation of cause and effect is not entirely correct. Nothing adds up in a world where there seems to be more than one because there is no more than that which is one since it is formless, thus endless. This is what the explanations in Alexius’ Duality Hacks are meant to illustrate. Hence they only work when used to expose a world where there seems to be more than one is fantasy.

This explanation is also fiction, and so is the idea that somebody is making or getting it – just like nobody, in particular, is making a dream, nor anybody having it, as there is nothing in it. Hence Alexius’ Duality Hacks is not a new philosophy with the answers to the world’s problems or why and how we appear to be there as separated beings. There is no answer to that or anything else because there is no more than that which is one, and it takes more than one to explain something.

Therefore, ultimately speaking, it does not matter if you are in sync with the brain’s script, thus happy, or perceive the script in such a way that you appear to be more exceptional than scripted, hence looking for happiness which you never find because it comes from being in sync with the brain’s script.

That is why, in the context of the world where we appear to be, everything seems much easier when one’s perception is in sync with the brain’s script. Hardly any thoughts are needed for that, and as they compile themselves from the pool of thoughts the brain has made for this (read more about that here), there are no stray thoughts to disturb you. In contrast, it requires much effort to make a perception where you appear more special than the basic self, created by the brain.

You must seek out specific thoughts to look special, and by doing so, they start to scamper around and fight each other, which feels stressful – especially since it affects your interpretation of yourself and the world. Therefore, the special self concludes, it is best to get rid of some or all thoughts, or at least slow them down via meditation or something else that supports the idea of being in control.

However, this enhances the problem, which is that the special self perceives itself to be the master and the brain its servant. It is the other way around. So if the special self honours the brain for producing the experiences of being someone by perceiving them as they are and not as they could be, happiness comes all by itself. Actually, so much that the few thoughts required for having a perception in sync with the brain are unnoticed. See also Happiness cannot be found. It comes effortlessly when in sync with the brain.

Everything is always going your way. If it does not seem so, you are not going your way. Not in the sense that you are going the wrong way. It is not possible. But it is possible to perceive it in a way that is not your way. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

In short, if we do not edit the perception the brain automatically generates of ourselves, we are in sync, thus rewarded with so much happiness that we feel loved and love everybody as ourselves (read more about that here).

As that means you do not spend time looking for happiness, you read Alexius’ Duality Hacks without looking for something in them to make you happy. Hence they reveal the nothingness of what and where you believe in being while you have fun reading them.

Many try to solve the feeling of not being good enough by finding somebody who will admire them. They mistake that for being loved. Others may clean the house, go shopping, eat, smoke, have sex, or whatever makes them forget they do not feel wanted. However, most try to resolve thrir feeling of infirioty by making others wrong. But none of it works, because feeling unwanted comes from how you think the world should respond to you and not how it does.

The root of this mispercection can be found by walking down memory lane. But it probably takes a long time and you may miss it. Fortunately, the misperception can be corrected right away by perceiving your inferioty as ‘it as it is what it is.’ This takes the sting out of the feeling, so whatever appeared to make you feel wrong does not have an affect on you. Therefore, the next time you by reflex make a perception that implies you are not good enough, you laugh because´it as it is what it is

Read more about this perception in ‘I know what it is’ vs ‘it is what it is’ vs ‘dunno what it is’

NOTE: This article is part of hack #4.2 The brain’s script and how to perceive it to feel happy.